Christmas came early for us last year. More than once. In fact, we had Christmas every day for about a week.
I can hear that sharp intake of breath from certain corners now. "What?! We didn't make our children wait for the Big Day? How will they ever learn delayed gratification? Whatever happened to 'Do not open until Christmas'? Where is the magic of Christmas morning??"
Trust me, it didn't lose any of its magic! We hear all the time about how Christmas is supposed to be for the children, right? Well, my children were finding Christmas incredibly stressful, to the point that one of them was beating their own head until purple bruises appeared. Just picture that, please, and let that sink in. My baby was so distressed by all the inescapable "magic of Christmas" that he was hitting himself hard enough to leave bruises. Over and over again. And in spite of our efforts to hold him and keep him calm.
At the same time, we were getting remarks from some people about how our children must be missing out because we weren't taking them to tree-lighting events and grottos and cinemas and parties. And then from others we had suggestions that maybe we were expecting too much, and we should not force our children into Christmas plays, and should stop dragging them out to parties and grottos and tree-lighting events and accept that we need to have a quiet holiday for their sakes. Either case was quite hurtful. It is hard enough having to give up one tradition or one outing or event after another that you had looked forward to sharing with your loved ones, and still just not be able to modify Christmas enough to make it enjoyable for them, without having judgement thrown at you from both sides.
The fact is, we already have a very, very quiet Christmas. Because we homeschool, we don't have Christmas plays or concerts to prep for, we don't have multiple parties, and we try to avoid crowded places during December. But it's still not enough. The anticipation is inescapable.
So I decided enough was enough. One morning when all the children were either in meltdown or in full-blown demand avoidance, I announced that it was bedtime, closed the curtains, and put them to bed at 10am. Pyjamas, kisses, bedtime story - the whole night-time ritual. I left them there for half an hour, just long enough to get the presents ready and fill the stockings, and then roused them again for Christmas morning. And it worked! Christmas had come at last.
They were so happy, they asked me to wake them up for Christmas morning again the next day. So each evening, we put everything back under the tree (we don't do paper wrapping anyway), and then found them again each morning. It was magical. They were happy. The tension was broken and they could relax again. I had to cancel our few plans for the week, but thankfully our friends were understanding.
The thing is, if it's supposed to be a celebration, why stick to other people's traditions if they don't work for you? Standard Christmas doesn't work for us, but that doesn't mean we "don't do Christmas". It just means we do it our way.
